Review by: the Dark Falcon

J.M. Vargas says I look for bad games while the rest of the world looks for good ones? Please! I look for bad games with the same enthusiasm that Eddie Murphy looks for transvestites. It's just that, lately, I've played a lot of Sega's incredible library, and, well, I've grown bored enough to rent some of the older junk to give it a run-throug. Fortunately, on my latest run, I've gotten into a bit of a 3DO kick myself and snagged up Gex for a good play, and the results of the usual 3DO portover were pleasing and not-so-harmful as expected.

The plot goes like this. Gex is a gecko (a stylish lizard for you non-nature lovers) who has a seminormal life. He does nuke Funkercize (please please PLEASE don't ask me...I simply play the game), does wisecracks at the whip of a tongue, etc. But, mostly, he watches TV. And I mean a lot of TV, at least according to what the manual says. One day, during viewing, he eats a bug that flies in the room, not realizing that it's an electrical device sent by the hideous alien Rez, a cyberbeing bent on serving some punishment to a poor sap. So, with a quick grab, Rez pulls Gex into the hideous world of...gasp!...reruns, and it's up to the cool-talking gecko to escape.

During its reign on 3DO, Gex featured, at the time, great graphics, paling only in comparison to Nintendo's 16-bit gorilla Donkey Kong Country. The reason I say this is because they ran a little bit choppier on 3DO, but were still fluid enough to be considered solid. Now, on the Saturn, the pace is a little smoother, and the colorful backgrounds and enemies have all retained their high-gloss looks. The detail is sweet, too. You got murky green graveyards, plant-life flowing jungles, exotic Kung Fu landscapes, electronic hell designs, and even a bouncy cartoon world where anything, even trailer parks, goes. Gex himself also looks sharp, thanks to CG animation that doesn't skimp.

The control of Gex is simple. You got a jump button, a run button (handy for those quick escapes), a tongue button (which enables you to swallow up power-ups and spit them out at free will), and a tail button, which lets you swing your tail in numerous directions to take on the odd cast of enemies. You can also bounce on their heads to destroy them, a prerequisite in most 2-D side-scrollers. The control is still about a second off, like it was in the 3DO version, but it's still very tight and doesn't cause an onslaught of accidental deaths (you know, the kind where you stand up and stomp and go, "Ooh, I made that jump! I DID!").

The real treat in Gex comes from his own voice. Dana Gould, a comic that's appeared on numerous HBO and Comedy Central specials (you know, that...uh...Gould guy!), wrote up all the one-liners for Gex and spits them out with the energy of a game show host/car salesman. Launch yourself on someone's tombstone and he'll snap, "Sorry, Mr. Presley." Enter the luscious Kung Fu world and he'll break out into a round of "Kung Fu Fighting", that oh-so- unforgettable 70's song. It's that kind of zing that makes Gex a riot while you play, and, strangely enough, they still seem fresh after two years on the shelf. Go figure. (shrugs)

The music in Gex is not bad, as each stage features a collection of tunes specifically for its type of level. Heavy organ grinding and ghostly cackles surround you in the Graveyard, while "sproings" and a bouncy little number engulf you in the Cartoon World.

So, is Gex fun? Of course! There's several levels (including an entire hidden world), and the challenge is right on the money, although the pros will walk through it like it was a lawn-mow. But, hey, fun at least. Try saying that about Phoenix 3 (yes, J.M., that was about as much fun as a root canal).

To sum it up, Gex really did have some originality to it on 3DO, and, even though it seems aged at this point in time (his next game, due this Xmas, puts him in a vivid 3D world on Playstation), it still has a sort of gotta-play magnetism to it that you can't resist checking out at least once. I rate Gex an 8 out of 10.

And as for Space Hulk, well, "it's about as much fun as being Mike Tyson's cellmate on Valentine's Day". I won't EVEN review that one. Yuck.